Chocolate craving. A serious wicked ass chocolate craving.
I am sitting here eating M&M’s and Smarties mixed together in a bowl. Honestly, I thought I had the golden craving ticket in the meat drawer in the fridge (because that is where all sane women hide their chocolate – a meat drawer) but alas my coveted Fruit and Nut bar was gone (probably my own fault, due to the Great Chocolate Craving of July 20th) leaving me digging through The Dictators treats in the cupboard for some relief.
M&M’s? Not such a relief – sure it fills the hole but it is so unsatisfying. Even with a big glass of milk on the side. Anyways, I started with the M&M’s and then decided I needed some variety so I threw the Smarties in for good measure (also considered was York Peppermint Patties and Rosebuds – totally should have had a peppermint patty). As I am eating my way through the bowl I found my self completely pissed off each time I popped an M&M in my mouth. They really suck. What is up with the chalky texture of the chocolate?
So as an apology to the Americans who read my blog I am SO SORRY that you guys not only have to deal with George Bush (who entertains the hell out of me – pure comedy that man!) but that you don’t have SMARTIES to get you through the tough times. Really you should totally picket the FDA or whoever makes the crappy candy covered chocolate decisions down there.
To clear up confusion:
These are Canadian Smarties
This is what Americans call Smarties
In Canada we call those Rockets, see?
Also don’t go to a Dairy Queen in Canada and try to order an M&M Blizzard because we rock the Smarties here. They may look at you like you are crazy.
Now that I am venting about my pregnancy induced candy crazies – WTF happened to orange flavor Tic Tac’s? All I can find in the store recently are these new Tic Tac Bold things. They suck and are way too strong to give to The Dictator as a “mint” when he asks for one. We ran out of our American stash of orange Tic Tac’s a couple of weeks ago and I have been hurting ever since. Now in Canada they have screwed with our Tic Tac’s before – behold the stupidity:
Canadian Orange Tic Tacs are in an orange package but the Tic Tac is actually white – this I can live with:
The Americans get proper Tic Tacs:
And these new things totally suck, they taste like a cross between fruit gum and your Grandma’s awful air-freshner with a squirt of old lady perfume thrown in. You know – if you can imagine what that tastes like. Sadly, it is all I can find lately are these total CRAP tasting “Bold” Tic Tacs.
Is it always necessary to screw with a good thing?