Potty training The Dictator has taken up all of my past week. I had no idea that getting one little boy to whizz in a toilet could be so time consuming. BUT we still have one small problem. He will not poop in the potty.
Getting The Dictator to pee in the potty full time (even in underwear overnight) was easy, almost too easy. Stewart and I used simple bribery in the form of Potty Claus (you know Santa’s brother who really likes toilets but not in a creepy way?) and getting him to unwrap a present every time he initiated using the potty himself (my previous method of potty training was based on The Relentless Nagging Technique). On February 10th we unwrapped the first (and so far LAST) big present for pooping in the potty. Yet he will not poop again.
We are in underwear full time because I thought he would hate the feeling of poop in his underwear. Pffftttt…
Tonight I gave him some prune/apple juice to hopefully loosen things up so tomorrow will not hurt and maybe he will want to go in the toilet. If not then I will need to hire a real life Shit Ninja to poop train this little man.
Thankfully, even as a baby he would never poop anywhere but at home and it seems like he is still hanging onto that habit. Because what do you even do with a shit filled pair of TowMater underwear in public? Ick.
The Deuce is shaping up to be The Most Awesome Baby. She is a big girl now, HUGE actually and sleeps through the night (and not the 6 hours through the night the parenting books talk about, I am talking 10 hours straight, getting up to eat and sleeping 2 more hours) which is nice because I am much more rested and productive right now.
The last couple days after The Deuce gets up to eat (~6:30m-ish) I have been going to the basement and putting about 45 minutes in on my Tony Little Gazelle machine before The Dictator gets up. This is great because I am not using naptime to exercise, and lets face it at 7am I have a hard time going back to bed for less then 1 hour of sleep. Also I have an hour alone with The Dictator before The Deuce gets up to eat again, which means once The Dictator is fed I have some time to get the morning chores out of the way and have a shower myself.
Sadly when I got on my Gazelle (which has been hiding in the storage room for 2 years – yeek!) I realized that my ass is on The Big Side. How big?
BEHOLD:
Not good for the ego ‘yo.
Could be worse though I could have Tony Little’s Hair or Creepy Smile.
seriously? She sleeps through the night that’s not even fair. Danger is still up at least twice
I hear men “like big butts, and they cannot lie…” and I am running with that!
I’m so proud of you for exercising at that hour!
And you throw shit-filled Towmater underpants out when you are in public. You do not at all ever attempt to recover them.
I love the title of this post.
And we are in the exact same place with the potty training. Sometimes pee, never poo. I’m totally on board with the bribery, but so far it’s getting us nowhere.
Cute hair, by the way! Did I already tell you that?